Masuk Free Press

Although they all share the same sticky floors, creaky stalls and general smell, it is a truth universally acknowledged among Masuk students that not all bathrooms are created equal. A few times a day, all Masuk students make a choice of blind faith: picking which bathroom to put their trust in. If it is a passing period, you are risking three hundred people crowding around the sink. If it is any old day in B hall, you are likely to be met with an unexplainable and extremely off putting humidity. 

Yes, bathrooms are bathrooms, and I will always dissuade you from spending any unnecessary time in there, but there is something to be said about the hierarchy of the facilities. Is there truly a best bathroom? I took to the Masuk population to find out.

If Masuk bathrooms had a homebase, it would be B hall. As the closest bathroom upon entering the building, B hall gets a lot of foot traffic, and it shows. Attempting to use B hall in warm weather is an experience I would not recommend. As the tiniest bathroom, B hall is prone to a strange fog that makes the floors slick and amplifies the smell. 

The most used bathroom gets some understandable wear and tear, but some unfixed breaks in B hall are aggravating inconveniences. For example, the lock on the second stall door of the girls bathroom has been broken since 2021, and renders that stall unusable. In such a bustling bathroom, the loss of usable space is greatly missed. 

Another common issue B hall faces is the sinks. When multiple people are trying to use the sink at one time, they shoot a pathetic stream of water around one centimeter away from the faucet. Washing your hands becomes a humbling, painfully slow experience.

I conducted an anonymous survey among Masuk students pertaining to their favorite bathrooms and the reasoning behind their choice. Out of 65 respondents, B hall won the love of 6.2 percent of students, or, a measly four people. 

When asked to explain their preference, one Masuk student responded that, “there is a small amount of people vaping. I can use that bathroom for its intended purpose.” 

As the closest bathrooms to the front doors, B hall is the closest bathroom to the security desk, so it is plausible to assume that it receives the most surveillance out of all of the bathrooms. With that being the case, there is less of an opportunity for students to use that bathroom for unsavory purposes. 

Respondents who do not enjoy B hall describe the atmosphere as, “noisy,” “gross,” and “smells like weed.” A fair assessment. Another one of B halls shortcomings comes with the perpetually closed stalls and crowded atmosphere proximity to the cafeteria brings. 

One student advises to avoid it “during third or seventh period due to the lunch wave [rush]” as it is near impossible to find an available stall. This is not an underdog situation. It has become a uniting opinion among masuk students that the B hall bathroom is not our shiniest jewel. 

Opinions of J hall, the largest bathroom in the center of the school, often divides students. While more space in a bathroom is never a bad thing, I have found that it invites extreme crowds, and entering during passing time is a futile effort. Due to the issues of congregation in the bathrooms, it is common to find security stationed in by the window outside of the entrances in order to reduce issues. After said issues inevitably occur, J hall is frequently found locked for the day, inconveniencing the large percentage of Masuk students who use the bathrooms for their actual purpose. 

Polling far ahead of B hall, J hall won the love of 26.2 percent of the 65 students polled. 

Admirers of J hall appreciate how “if you time it right, there are no vapers, and it is empty.” 

A lot of students appreciate the central location of J hall, claiming that the other two bathrooms are far out of the way.

The most common complaint from anonymous respondents is the issue that J hall is often “too busy,” and the pressure of “everyone always [being in] there” is enough to make most students avoid that bathroom. The boys bathroom even suffers from missing stall doors, and students complain that they can not find “stalls available.” J hall has a prevalent problem of students entering the bathroom just to sit and stay, which makes an uncomfortable atmosphere for students using the facilities for their intended purpose. One student even said that he feels as though that atmosphere makes entering the bathrooms “feel illegal to go in.” 

While J hall does have some positive attributes, reports of overcrowding and general uncomfortableness flooded my pollings. During class periods, J hall can be a quiet, empty place to find refuge in for a few minutes. At any time that the general Masuk population is milling about, I, and most Masuk students dissuade you from attempting to enter. 

The G hall bathroom is universally known among Masuk students as the quietest, cleanest bathroom. Those favorable traits are credit to its location: snugly tucked away at the end of G hall and back end of H. 

Compared to its siblings, the foot traffic is minimal, and upon entering, you have a 50 percent chance of being alone. At such a large school, time to yourself for a minute during a busy day is something highly coveted among students. Unfortunately, a lot of Masuk students do not do well under lack of supervision. Privacy has become an open invitation for students to take advantage of the security-less corner. 

G hall is a constant site for vandalism. Vice Principal Ian Lowell had to shut down the boys sector on Sept. 13, and who can forget the infamous tally chart inked in the girls room in 2021? 

Regardless of the misdeeds that commonly occur in G hall, it won the favor of 56.9 percent, or 37 poll-takers. Always “empty and clean,” Masuk students revel in the fact it gives them a minute to “be alone.” Students also chose G hall for their less specific bathroom needs. The fact that it does not smell makes a nice environment for changing for sports, and a few respondents brought up the fact that when getting ready in G, “the lighting is better for makeup.” These high praises were standouts among a flood of criticism for the other, less desired bathrooms, and made G hall’s victory remarkably clear.

What truly makes a  “good bathroom”? At Masuk, bathrooms of choice were described as “peaceful,” “not as crowded,” and of course, “clean.” It became abundantly clear that students are drawn to the bathrooms where they do not have to share space. At the end of the day, students consider their personal “best bathroom” an opportunity for privacy, cleanliness and a momentary reprise from the hustle of the school day.